regret but words

i am sorry my friends. i will try to refrain from using this as a complaining forum and just an observation forum.

there are a few observations of recent that have made me think just a little. unfortunately, i cannot remember any of them because my brain is slightly fried.

studying.

but no complaining here. just getting what needs done.

i do remember my contemplations of a certain topic. i was wondering why i cannot be content with my station in life. it's not just that i am young, but there are things that i want, but will come eventually. why can't i just be happy with what i am given now? i think that would be the best gift of all. it wouldn't do much for this capitolistic society, but there is a difference between contentment and laziness.

so i wish this for other people. if they could just be content with themselves and very few other things life ever seems to give us. i believe it is possible to have everything, but not really have anything at all. this is what makes me kind of strange because i don't want to be dependent on much, but i want to be desparate to give, love, and to enjoy life. it must have to do with building one's life around God and not anything else. because everything else will change, leave you, hurt, or even just not be good for you. this makes sense. if it were only so easy to implement. alas. the truth is easy to talk about, but it is never easy in action.