sun days in the morning
the sun was shining but the air was cold. the shadows of the buildings were so cold that it made the light of the sun seem golden. instead of lingering in the shadows for coolness, it's time to hurry through them for warmth. in the passings of my mind i've realized that i focus too much on the exterior. in an effort to realize that misfortunate mistake, usually made in church, i righted a wrong. no singing, but active participation. then sitting down and eyes closed and just listening.
in the cool darkness of my mind i could focus on what was being said and what i was to hear. the words that drifted into my state of consciousness soaked into my head for a bit and the really good items of ideology traveled to the pen. repentance is just changing your mind and all at once i figured out why i can't seem to control the past. redemption is a fleeting moment.
it wasn't flashy and it wasn't mystical. it just was. the understanding of what i do not know crept into my mind and i suddenly missed what i had never missed before. all the wants i've really ached for were forced upon one Being.
it was as if my life was screwed up and i just wanted to drift away. but life is good. it was that nagging feeling that this is all there is to life as the disappointment taughts you to figure a way out of this plain situation. except this feeling existed in such a time that was filled with a sad feeling of missing dear friends, family, and my dear. i missed someone who has left, but willing to give them up for just one who can fulfill all of their metaphorical roles.
i wrapped my mind around the concept that i longed and loved something i could not understand and have never known. the ideal of logic can't possibly use its wits of rationality to erase this time away. how can the church exists like this? and why hasn't it done so before now?
i did it. i loved God like a child and just sat there and wanted Him to come more than anything. not because my world needs fixing, but just because i needed him. i needed him like i needed my mom and dad, my friends, and my dear scott. and it was true.
so cheers to the truth that no one can explain. cheers to the beauty of the sun days in the morning.
in the cool darkness of my mind i could focus on what was being said and what i was to hear. the words that drifted into my state of consciousness soaked into my head for a bit and the really good items of ideology traveled to the pen. repentance is just changing your mind and all at once i figured out why i can't seem to control the past. redemption is a fleeting moment.
it wasn't flashy and it wasn't mystical. it just was. the understanding of what i do not know crept into my mind and i suddenly missed what i had never missed before. all the wants i've really ached for were forced upon one Being.
it was as if my life was screwed up and i just wanted to drift away. but life is good. it was that nagging feeling that this is all there is to life as the disappointment taughts you to figure a way out of this plain situation. except this feeling existed in such a time that was filled with a sad feeling of missing dear friends, family, and my dear. i missed someone who has left, but willing to give them up for just one who can fulfill all of their metaphorical roles.
i wrapped my mind around the concept that i longed and loved something i could not understand and have never known. the ideal of logic can't possibly use its wits of rationality to erase this time away. how can the church exists like this? and why hasn't it done so before now?
i did it. i loved God like a child and just sat there and wanted Him to come more than anything. not because my world needs fixing, but just because i needed him. i needed him like i needed my mom and dad, my friends, and my dear scott. and it was true.
so cheers to the truth that no one can explain. cheers to the beauty of the sun days in the morning.
posted by Dot Spot at 2:53 PM
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